Stevie J. Cole on what it would be like to interview Pandemic Sorrow.
“They’ll be in a few minutes, Tiff. You ready?”
I nod and smile. “Yeah.” Shit. I’m nervous.
Todd opens the door to the conference room but stops to look back at me. “They’re a lot to handle. Just don’t….provoke them or anything.”
“Provoke them, what are they freaking rabid animals?” I laugh.
His gaze trails down to my chest, and his lips lay flat across his face. “No, that’s enough to provoke them. Might want to pull that up a little.”
I huff, and Todd walks out the door. Muffled voices filter through the other side of the door, laughter. Shit. Shit. Shit. I’ve interviewed countless rockers since starting at this magazine company, and I have never been this anxious. I mean, hell, it’s Pandemic Sorrow. Jag Steele, Stone Steele, Rush…and that drummer whose name I can’t ever remember. Jack, Travis…Pax!
The door swings open and my breathing ceases for a second. Jag struts in. I have never in my life seen a man with so much swagger. He’s dressed in a tight black v-neck, jewelry draped all over him, and his jeans—my eyes instinctually fall to his crotch—holy shit, those pants are tight.
I‘m so focused on how tight Jag’s pants are that I completely miss the other guys trail in and take their seats.
“It’s real, wanna touch it?” Jag chuckles and I feel my entire face redden.
“Ah, no. Nice gesture and all.”
He shrugs and yanks out his chair, turning it around as he adjusts his junk before straddling it.
I sit, staring around the room. I realize I must look like a complete idiot, and I clear my throat. “So, let’s start with a simple question for each of you. What was the driving force behind your pursuit to fame?
Jag’s lips curve in to a delicious smile. “Pussy. Lots of pussy.”
Rush laughs as he leans over the table toward me. “For me,” his eyes skim down to my low cut top, “the promise of nightly orgies.”
Oh, fuck. I am in for it. I need to divert my attention away from these two whores. Where’s that drummer? I eye Pax, who’s not even looking in my direction. His chin is slumped to his chest, and all I can see is his spikey blonde hair. I think he’s asleep.
“Uh, Pax?” He slowly raises his head. “What drove you to fame?”
“I dunno, money?
“I actually have a worthwhile answer, unlike these shitheads.” Stone taps his fingers on the table. “I wanted to do something everyone told me I couldn’t.
I can’t stop the ridiculous smile making its way over my lips. Damn, Stone is hot. Those brown eyes, those cheekbones, that hair. I’m swooning, not going to lie. “Okay, next question is for Rush. Rush, if you had to be something besides a rock star, what would it be?
“Oh, that’s easy.” He stands up, grabs the edge of the table and pelvic thrusts against it so hard it scoots an inch across the floor. “Hands down, a porn star. James Deen can go fuck himself because his measly nine inches don’t have shit on my man-cock.” He laughs as he collapses back down in his chair.
I giggle, and his face goes all serious.
“No, really. A porn star.”
Jag shoves him so hard he knocks him out of his chair. “Rush, you couldn’t be a porn star. You don’t have any fucking stamina.”
“I’ve got loads of stamina.”
“Like shit you do—”
“Hey!” I shout. They both turn to look at me, and for a moment, I’m afraid I just really pissed them off. I timidly clear my throat. “Next question. Stone, what’s it like working with your brother?”
He smirks. “I mean, when I’m not babysitting his ass, it’s tolerable.”
Jag is too busy making lewd hand motions at Rush to be offended by that, so I go on to the next question on my list. “So, guys, what’s it like to be Pandemic Sorrow? It must be incredible to be so famous?
Pax shrugs as he mumbles, “It’s cool.”
Rush tosses his hands in the air. “Fucking amazing! Are you kidding me?” He shakes his head as he grins. “I can’t even explain to you how amazing this shit is. I keep thinking I’m going to wake up and find out I’ve been in a coma or something, and that I’m still just fucking up drive-thru orders at Burger Boy.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty awesome.” Stone nods. “Surreal. That may be the best word. It’s surreal. It’s weird to be flipping through the radio and hear your song on there. Sometimes, I don’t even feel like I am that dude.”
I smile politely. I love all of his down to earth comments. Unlike the other perverts in this room, he seems so adorably sweet. I glance over at Jag. It seems like he has checked out momentarily. He’s staring down at his hands as he fidgets with one of the rings on his finger. “Jag, what about you. What’s it like to be so famous?”
He glances up at me, his face completely void of any emotion. “Oh, uh. It’s great. Really.” Pausing, he wipes his hands down the legs of his jeans. “You know, paparazzi following you around, so you can’t even shake your dick without it making a headline. Always a party, always a show, always fans screaming at you. Yep. Couldn’t be better.”
That didn’t seem authentic in the least. Honestly, he looks miserable. What do I say to that? Nodding, I say, “I can’t imagine. It must be tiring.”
There’s an awkward silence. I flip through my tablet and find the next question. “So, we had some fans write in with questions they wanted you guys to answer. One fan asked that each of you describe your perfect mate.” I look over at Rush. “Why don’t you go first since you want to be the porn star and all?”
His lips curl, his eyes twinkle, and then he smirks. “A girl that likes company in the bed. Kinda like—” He narrows his gaze on me as he arches a brow. “You gonna publish all the stuff I say, right?”
“Yeah, unless you ask me not to.”
“Oh, no. I want this in there more than anything else I’m gonna say.” He clears his throat, smiling proudly. “A complete freak, kinda like I imagine Jules would be. She’s our assistant manager. We all know she likes being treated like a dirty slut.”
“Uh, Rush, you probably shouldn’t—“
“Oh, no, she expects shit like this. Seriously though, I need a freak.”
Jag groans. “Yeah, sure, Tink looks like a freak. Rush, she looks like she’d be a damn lame lay.” He leans over the table as he thumbs his lip piercing. “I need a girl that would put me in my place every once and a while.”
“That’s a good answer, Jag.” I turn to Stone and my cheeks heat. “What about you?”
“Honestly, I can’t even think about that. I’m so consumed with my career, I know I would be a shitty boyfriend, but I do like short girls.”
Yep, swooning again. “Pax, what about you?”
He shrugs. God, he has no personality whatsoever. “Oh, just give me a girl that hasn’t been rammed by these three fuckers and I would be good.”
Jag flips him the bird. “Fuck off, Paxton.”
“You sick of sloppy seconds, drummer boy?” Rush asks as he shoves him.
Pax swats Rush’s hand away. “Fuck you dick dribbles, don’t get all pissy just because I didn’t want to join in for your orgy last night,” he shouts. “I don’t like slapping dicks with you sick fucks.”
I can feel my jaw hanging open. They are arguing with each other; yelling, cursing.
The next thing I know, Stone is waving his hand in the air to get my attention. “Tiffany?” He whistles.
I glance over at him, and he is sitting there so relaxed like none of this phases him. He smiles sweetly at me. “I assure you, none of them know how to use their dicks the way I do.”
Oh, hell. Compose yourself, boo. I think I’m getting sweat stains under my arms! Oh, crap! I hear a loud bang. Jag just threw Pax on the floor, and Rush is laughing. This is a disaster. Smile, smile…
Stone stands and walks over to me. “They’ll knock each other out eventually. And while they are…” he swats a stray piece of hair from my face. “Why don’t I go knock the fuck outta you?”
I shouldn’t, I know I shouldn’t, but this is Stone Steele. I take another quick look at the three guys rolling around on the floor, then eye the door.
“Come on, you pretty little thing.” Stone barely touches his warm lips to mine before pulling me toward the door.
I am most likely going to get fired from the magazine now, but I don’t really care. I mean, who in their right mind would turn this guy down?
"My name's Jag Steele. I’m the lead singer and guitarist to the band Pandemic Sorrow, and I have a drug problem. Well, I mean it's not really a problem – unless you count the fact that I almost made my heart explode from all the blow I shoved up my nose a few weeks back..."
That was my introduction during my first stint in rehab. I'm messed up. If you asked anybody who I am there’s a list they will go down: Famous, rock star, legend, drug addict, womanizing man-whore, but if you asked me, I wouldn't have the first idea of what to say, because I don’t know who Jag Steele is. Really, I’m living every other damn person's dream, and all I want is reality.
Roxy Slade, that girl was my reality. My brutally flawed and beautifully broken reality. And she hated everything I stood for. To her I was just one of “those guys”, and she’d rather be buried alive with poisonous snakes than give someone like me a piece of toilet paper to wipe their ass with. Brutal. Life. Is. Brutal. And it is just a giant pain, which is why I chase after anything to make it numb, anything that can fill this void. I just want anything that can make me not feel. I just don't want to feel.
Jag (Pandemic Sorrow #1)
Amazon US: http://amzn.to/1VHyEeY
Amazon UK: http://amzn.to/1BxtOWs
My Review of Jag
Oh. MY. GOD. Jag… I’m so confused on my thoughts and how to form the sentences to articulate my feelings about this crazy wonderfully fucked up story without sounding crazy myself.
This is not your average Rocker Romance, frankly speaking this is one of the most honest, gritty and straight up messed up reads I’ve read in a long time.
I honestly loved it and felt a bit addicted to it as I read it. It was like crack for my soul!!!!!
I honestly loved it and felt a bit addicted to it as I read it. It was like crack for my soul!!!!!
For me, Jag was one of those “ok I need a break, I ‘m gonna throw my ipad, I cant read this story it’s too much (puts ipad down….)
Then 5 minutes later…
"umm no no, I need to know what happens, I can’t stop thinking about it…(picks ipad up and reads it in 1 day…yup 1 day!).
Crack I tell you.
Crack I tell you.
This is the story of the man formally known as Jagger. Jagger, who is unable to cope with all the fame, fortune and demands of being a “Rock God”. At the beginning we see how the transformation happened. How Jagger looses his true identity, as he is swallowed up by the fame and is spit out (thanks to a certain asshole’s influence) into living the life of a completely fucked up, addict and rocker now known simply as, Jag Steele.
“ Snorting that line had been the moment that had changed everything in my life” -Jag
I really did love Jag’s story sooo much, I felt like I was privy to his life experiences and from the flashbacks I felt I gained insight and understanding as to why Jag became the way that he did.
How he was clean, then relapses, the need for numbness, why he chooses drugs, his thoughts, his feelings, his anger and all the emotion in between.
With chapters so vividly written it was easy to get sucked into his lifestyle and I could almost see why Jag had no choice but to sacrifice Jagger to the lifestyle he had chosen.
Mrs. Cole writes of a person who has first hand experience with addiction and from the way she pens Jag's tale its obvious how hurtful and cruel drug
I swear this story will touch your soul and leave you pondering about it long after its end.
How he was clean, then relapses, the need for numbness, why he chooses drugs, his thoughts, his feelings, his anger and all the emotion in between.
With chapters so vividly written it was easy to get sucked into his lifestyle and I could almost see why Jag had no choice but to sacrifice Jagger to the lifestyle he had chosen.
Mrs. Cole writes of a person who has first hand experience with addiction and from the way she pens Jag's tale its obvious how hurtful and cruel drug
I swear this story will touch your soul and leave you pondering about it long after its end.
I really struggled to compartmentalize my emotions while reading this book, I was angry, sad, disgusted, tearing, then strangely cheering! And there were seriously parts where I kept questioning whether I could keep on reading.
So many times I found myself tearing up and just feeling so much empathy towards Jag, his self-loathing killed me! I kept asking whether things were ever going to look up for him, and Jesus, how much lower can this guy get?
I just need him to have some sort of light in a never ending tunnel of gloom.
So many times I found myself tearing up and just feeling so much empathy towards Jag, his self-loathing killed me! I kept asking whether things were ever going to look up for him, and Jesus, how much lower can this guy get?
I just need him to have some sort of light in a never ending tunnel of gloom.
But like I said, I was completely addicted to the story, drawn like a month to a flame, I needed to see where this was going. And let me tell you Jag’s journey has so many WTF?? moments that I cant even point which affected me the most as a reader.
From an argument with his dad, to a shocking run in with his first love, to being introduced to drugs by a mentor, coupled with nights of loneliness and sex with countless women… no wonder Jag is all kinds of fucked up…
But of course I read on because honestly, I LOVED HIM!! And again this book is Crack and
I’m 100% ADDICTED!!!!
There is just something with the way his character is written, you just can’t help not to love Jag!
I’m 100% ADDICTED!!!!
There is just something with the way his character is written, you just can’t help not to love Jag!
Jag is simply all kinds of messed up and above all just really needs someone to care, to just love him! Someone to see through all his issues and rock god bullshit…Someone to support and help revive he who was once was simply… Jagger!
“ I had a person to handle every damn aspect of my life, except there was no one to handle me” -Jag
Enter Roxy... I FUCKING LOVE HER!! Right from the beginning she’s calling him on his shit and could care less about his fame and fortune! Roxy is not the fall down at his feet girl like the rest. Despite having her own messed up past and demons to battle she’s incredible! I love every second she’s around in the book. Roxy is the game-changer….the one Jag needs before he looses himself to addiction completely.
Their relationship is chalk full of beautiful ups and gut-wrenchingly low lows, its so very tumultuous.
But OH. MY. GOD do these two exude raw passion and love!
But OH. MY. GOD do these two exude raw passion and love!
Their emotional journey to be together had me on my knees I swear! I have never needed a fictional couple to be together as much as I needed Jag and Roxy to just be and stay together.
The battles over drugs, lies, insecurities and making the right choices is such a strong part of what made me love them, but when its just Roxy and Jagger I swear it’s the most amazing thing.
From hot, raw all consuming sex to tender moments with revelations shared and a trust like none other being built, the relationship they form is nothing other than a beautiful ray of light in such a raw and gritty read.
As much as Roxy is truly Jagger’s salvation, I honestly I feel he is hers as well.
Still I sit and write thinking about them and get tears in my eyes! I LOVE THEM!!!!
From hot, raw all consuming sex to tender moments with revelations shared and a trust like none other being built, the relationship they form is nothing other than a beautiful ray of light in such a raw and gritty read.
As much as Roxy is truly Jagger’s salvation, I honestly I feel he is hers as well.
Still I sit and write thinking about them and get tears in my eyes! I LOVE THEM!!!!
“There was some part of her I felt belonged to me, and for the first time, possibly in my life, I felt like part of me could belong to someone else.” -Jag
I have so much more to say, but I’ve decided to stop here. I could go on and on, and keep adding quotes, I’ve highlighted so much of this book it’s insane! So my advice…
GO BUY THIS BOOK NOW!
This book is truly an incredibly written story and I felt so many crazy emotions and thoughts while reading it. I honestly think Jag is going to give me one of the biggest BOOK HANGOVER’s I’ve EVER HAD! Honestly, one of my top 2014 reads for sure.
Thank- you Stevie J. Cole for giving (me) and the book loving world Jag.
Reviewed By Gillian Grybas
★★☆ BEYOND 5 this BOOK is like CRACK Stars ☆★★
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The industry owns me. And the only thing I have a minuscule grain of control with is women, but not that dominate, tie you up and gag you kind of control. No, I want to govern how I make them feel. I need them to feel like a goddess while I’m in them, and I love being able to control the fact that they’ll never really have me. Love is complicated. It is bullshit. And even if I thought I needed it, the rules of being a rocker won’t allow it.
Sex is all I need.
I don’t need love.
But for some reason I want her. For some reason I can’t get her out of my mind. And lately, every time I’m with any girl besides her it feels wrong.
I can practically have any woman I want, but I can’t have her. She’s off limits because she’s part of that industry that owns my ass.
Sex was all I had.
And sometimes I thought maybe love was all I needed…with her
Rush (Pandemic Sorrow #2)
Amazon US: http://amzn.to/1VHy0xX
Amazon UK: http://amzn.to/1IqHz0t
My Review of Rush
If your like me, and have read Jag, then you’ve probably been waiting for Rush with very little patience.
I was soooooo excited when I finally got my hands on Rush! I like seriously shut myself out of my life in order to delve right into the rock world Stevie so vividly pens her rockers living in.
For me, Rush was a bit of an unexpected read. There were times in Jag that I was drawn to knowing more about Rush, and then other parts where I wanted to throttle him. So I found my self once again feeling these love/hate emotions toward Rush as I read his story.
Like the typical rocker, Rush too is a complete mess, using sex and drugs to cope with the god like status and complex he's grown accustom to with years spent in the lime light.
Rush is a sex addict, honestly a complete man whore! But I still really kind of liked him…A LOT!
I thought Rush’s character was a mishmash of good, selfish, assholery and most of all potential; Rush has soooo much potential to be the loving man a woman could want and need.
Rush is a sex addict, honestly a complete man whore! But I still really kind of liked him…A LOT!
I thought Rush’s character was a mishmash of good, selfish, assholery and most of all potential; Rush has soooo much potential to be the loving man a woman could want and need.
There were many times, despite his whoring and douchy ways that I actually found myself feeling sorry for the jerk wanting him to find a place of solace.
Can a girl he’s wanted for 6 years be his calm?
Can he change his ways in order to be the man she deserves?
Enter Jules….the game changer?
Rush has wanted his assistant manager Jules for years, spending time on the tours, quiet nights on the buses getting to know each other has lead to an all out attraction and want like he has never known. The only problem is the 'no dating' her client’s rule that Jules must follow. Oh and the fact that she is torn on Rush’s whoring ways, doubting he could ever be monogamous.
I really liked Jules for the most part. I liked how she was clearly torn on getting involved with Rush as being their assistant manager she was more than aware of his whoring ways. Doubting his ability to be the man she needs and can trust. Of course she would be torn, as assistant manager she has even played a part in getting him laid for pete's sake! Going so far in her job to even being involved in helping fans get into the famous “suck-n-fuck”.
But the times when we see her falter and give into the lust and emotions she clearly feels for Rush we are treated to some smokin’ hot as hades sex!!! Jesus these two are a hot mess when going at each other! Stevie’s ability to write a sex scene is ‘fan yourself’ good.
That all being said I do need to mention that Jules also did annoy me, being so concerned about loosing her job, rather than being willing to risk it all for Rush pissed me off. I needed her to be 100% dedicated to our struggling to do right by her Rush!
That all being said I do need to mention that Jules also did annoy me, being so concerned about loosing her job, rather than being willing to risk it all for Rush pissed me off. I needed her to be 100% dedicated to our struggling to do right by her Rush!
What follows is a crazy roller coaster emotional read involving some many highs, lows and in-betweens that I just sat back and enjoyed the ride that is Rush. I did find this an emotional consuming read, with a few parts that had me stressing the fuck out, but in the end I’m once again given the ending I longed Rush to have. I did note a few parts where I felt it was repetitious to Jag and itself in some parts, as well as the characters can be a bit interchangeable, but that being said it is still a great read that had me consumed to see how the hell it was all going to play out.
★★☆ 4 Stars ☆★★
Reviewed by Gillian Grybas
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Jag Steele, the lead singer of the international rock band Pandemic Sorrow, was the epitome of everything I despised: arrogant, entitled, but the thing I hated most about him was that he was an addict. Drugs had been the demon that had ruined everything in my life, and anyone who had a love affair with them pretty much made my stomach turn. It brought up memories I wanted to stay buried. Needless to say, I wasn't exactly a fan of Jag.
Funny thing is, people aren't always who you expect them to be. Never in a million years would I have thought the night I meet Jag would have any significance on the rest of my life, but it did.
I found out that sometimes something that screams utter destruction might actually be your saving grace.
Some people may say our story is too screwed up to be a romance, but for two broken people, we made the pieces fit together perfectly.
Roxy (Pandemic Sorrow #3)
Amazon US: http://amzn.to/1ImlYUR
Amazon UK: http://amzn.to/1Ko3hQc
My Review of Roxy
You know those books that come along every so often, the ones that just have such an impact on you, that you feel like you will never forget it for as long as you live. Stories that burrow themselves deep inside your soul. Well that was Jag for me. It seriously impacted me, and still affects me today.
My Review of Roxy
You know those books that come along every so often, the ones that just have such an impact on you, that you feel like you will never forget it for as long as you live. Stories that burrow themselves deep inside your soul. Well that was Jag for me. It seriously impacted me, and still affects me today.
It’s a book I will never forget, It’s honestly one of the best books I’ve ever read.
SO when Stevie decided to give me Roxy. I LOST MY FUCKING MIND!
Like freaked the hell out! Then I had to wait, and wait.
But let me tell you the wait for the yin to Jag’s yang was soooooo worth it.
I FUCKING LOVED IT!!!
Stevie you just gah! Woman, Roxy was just so bloody perfect!
From the moment I began the first chapter in Roxy I was immediately brought back to the girl I just loved getting to see fall in love with our beloved Jag.
Roxy introduces us to her story with a warning of sorts. Basically telling us this is her story judge her if you dare but know she couldn't give a shit, she did what she had to do! I thought this little chat with the reader was brilliant, genius really. From this I knew immediately that Roxy once again would have my heat, attention, empathy, respect and cheers.
I loved how Stevie gave Roxy an instant voice. A perfect voice really.
From chapter one I was hooked.
With a glimpse into her childhood it's a wonder Roxy turned out to be the amazing woman she did. Surrounded by loss, poverty and drugs Roxy's story will move you and affect as expected from the likes of Mrs. Cole.
One of my favourite moments was getting to see Roxy affected by “the Jag Steele”. The same man she so desperately wanted to find revolting. The one whom while she's waiting in line at the meet and greet is now clenching her legs... Just a little bit. Ha! I loved getting her POV that these moments where I had been so curious before.
As the book progresses by heartbreaks for Roxy and the life she's lived. And here I thought she saved jag when in turn it's the opposite or a more level playing field if truth be told. Roxy is so resilient and strong you can’t help but be proud of her. I found myself cheering hard for this girl.
After living through the idea that being raised a troll- lowlife druggie scum only breads the same it takes an ex-boyfriend and a near death experience to change Roxy's outlook of life for the better.
Seeing Roxy make difficult decisions and being privy to her fight, determination and struggles just made me see how truly wonderful of a heroine she is. Witnessing her pain and torments was so palpable I was an emotions wreck.
But aside from the sadness there is an incredible love story that unfolds between Jag and Roxy and is simply amazing. From starting a family, overcoming addiction and fighting for love Roxy is one hell of a hot mess of a read that will leave you wishing it never had to end. God I love these two and man oh man do they have one hell of a spark.
It's been a long time since I connected so deeply with a female character Roxy just blew me away. I think she really is an amazing character who despite being given lemons in life indeed made some kick ass lemonade!
Stevie’s writing in Roxy was just bang on. As a mega fangirl I could not have asked for more….well other than more pages of course!
★★☆ 5 incredible Stars ☆★★
Reviewed by Gillian Grybas
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Pandemic Sorrow Series (Jag, Rush, & Roxy 3-in-1)
Three-in-one rocker boxset.
Sex, drugs, and rock and roll. The life of a rocker is gritty, and for the boys of Pandemic Sorrow, it's exhausting. Their existence is one of sleepless nights, binges with drugs, and the daunting task of pleasing women...lots and lots of women. Life is one endless party, and for both Jag and Rush, it's a path of utter self-destruction.
Warning: Jag and Rush are from a male point of view, and are very...male. They are vulgar and explicit and may have to work their way through a few fans before they find a woman who can tame these rocker's inner whore. All books contain explicit language and sexual situations.
Sex, drugs, and rock and roll. The life of a rocker is gritty, and for the boys of Pandemic Sorrow, it's exhausting. Their existence is one of sleepless nights, binges with drugs, and the daunting task of pleasing women...lots and lots of women. Life is one endless party, and for both Jag and Rush, it's a path of utter self-destruction.
Warning: Jag and Rush are from a male point of view, and are very...male. They are vulgar and explicit and may have to work their way through a few fans before they find a woman who can tame these rocker's inner whore. All books contain explicit language and sexual situations.
Box Set:
Amazon US: http://amzn.to/1Ko2Jd4
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